How many times has this happened to you? You’ve gone out of your way to help someone. You’ve spent time and energy, and possibly even incurred financial expense. Yet, once the person has benefitted from your kindness, he/she doesn’t bother to show appreciation, not even to say a sincere thank you.

I call this the “paper towel syndrome.” People use you like a paper towel, and then toss you out without a second thought. They’ve gotten what they needed out of you, and then they move right along with their lives as though they had always been entitled to your acts of kindness.

Thanks to Joseph’s interpretation of Pharaoh’s dreams, the Egyptians were spared a terrible calamity. Joseph offered a plan whereby the Egyptians could store produce of the seven years of abundance, so that they would have food during the following seven years of famine.

What if Joseph had not been there to give this advice? Presumably, the Egyptians would have fully enjoyed the seven years of abundance, thinking that prosperity would never end. When the famine would then arrive, the people would have been unprepared for the economic downturn. They would soon have run out of food and would have suffered years of starvation.

At a recent lunch meeting with friends, we were discussing the ugliness and lack of civility which too frequently characterize blog sites and online comments.  Modern technology makes it quite easy for people to post hostile remarks against those with whom they disagree. These ad hominem attacks gain lives of their own, being forwarded to readers who then forward them to others etc.  In a matter of a few seconds, people can spread “lashon hara” to a wide audience.

The Sages of Talmudic times often expressed profound ideas in terse, enigmatic statements. An example of this is found in the Midrashic comment: “The world was created in the merit of three things: in the merit of [the mitzvoth of] Hallah, tithes, and first fruits” (Yalkut Shimoni, Bereishith 1:2). If we were to speculate as to which mitzvoth were absolutely vital to the creation, we might have chosen other—seemingly more important—commandments: e.g. the Sabbath, the laws of holiness, the sanctification of One God etc.

In this week’s Torah portion, we read of the tragic deaths of two of Aaron’s sons. When he learned the sad news, “Aaron was silent,” vayidom Aharon. Commentators have offered various explanations of Aaron’s silence. He may have been speechless due to shock; he may have had angry thoughts in his heart, but he controlled himself from uttering them; he may have been silent as a sign of acceptance of God’s judgment.

Within biblical tradition, there are a number of phrases relating to confrontation with tragedy.

“Min haMetsar Karati Y-ah,” I call out to God from distress. When in pain, it is natural to cry out to God, to shed tears, to lament our sufferings and our losses. To cry out when we are in distress is a first step in the grieving process.

Angel for Shabbat

by Rabbi Marc D. Angel

Rabbi Akiba believed that parents transmit to their children six characteristics: physical appearance, strength, wealth, wisdom, longevity, and “mispar ha-dorot lefanav”—the number of generations before (Mishnah Eduyot 2:9). What is meant by this last phrase?

 This week’s Torah portion includes the instruction that we do that “which is right and good in the sight of the Lord” (Devarim 6:18).  Rabbinic tradition has understood this phrase to mean that we are required not merely to follow the letter of the law (that which is right), but to be compassionate beyond what the exact law demands (that which is good).  If we can conduct ourselves on this level of righteousness, we can live better lives for ourselves and can impact on the improvement of society.

I have been reading a new book by Israeli Nobel Prize Winner Dr. Daniel Kahneman, “Thinking, Fast and Slow” (Farrar, Strauss and Giroux, New York, 2011). On p. 47, he cites a fascinating psychological experiment conducted some years ago by Walter Mischel and his students.

Shalom and best wishes. I hope all is well and that your school year is going well. Through the generosity of several supporters of the Institute for Jewish Ideas and Ideals, we are able to offer students the following of my books at no charge. You may already have all or some of them; but if not, email me at [email protected] and let me know the book/s you'd like, as well as your mailing address.

Maimonides: Essential Teachings on Jewish Faith and Ethics (an introduction to the thought of Maimonides; a translation of most of the Book of Knowledge and 13 Principles of Faith; and a running commentary.)

Maimonides, Spinoza and Us: Toward an Intellectually Vibrant Judaism (a study of basic themes in the writings of Rambam and Spinoza)